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As a female in today’s society, it is an unfortunate fact that you have to be on your guard when it comes to being out at night. With the recent reports of drug spiking being on the rise, women are trying to be more vigilant than ever. And we are all asking the same simple question: Just how safe are women in today’s society?

I’m Sophie, I work for Alison Charles and have taken on this blog to bring some awareness to the dangers of spiking. As well as discussing the issues surrounding drug spiking and women’s safety, I will also be sharing my personal experience with an unprecedented drug spiking that happened to me only a month ago.

What are the dangers of spiking?

It almost goes unspoken, the ritualistic process in which women must take in order to ensure a safe night out. Making sure that you are not walking alone at night, covering your drink at every given moment, or phoning a friend when you get home to let them know you are alive. These precautions which have shockingly become normal to us are vital for our safety. We must be consistently on the lookout for danger. Unable to enjoy a simple night out with friends in case we end up under the influence of GHB or another unwelcome drug.

In a recent survey by The Tab on Instagram, around 23,000 students responded to the question “Since the start of the year, do you believe you have been spiked?”. Of these people, 2,625 answered yes. When asked if they knew someone who had been spiked, 50% (around 12,000 people) also answered yes. The newest issue that we are seeing all over the media now is the use of needles to drug women. There have been multiple reports of girls feeling the effects of spiking with no idea what happened. Only to find a pinprick-type wound later. As women become increasingly aware of their drinks, it seems the culprits are finding new ways to target women with drugs against their will. In my case, this could have been in the almost unheard-of form. A cigarette!

My experience of being spiked

On the 15th of September this year, just a month ago, I was spiked in London. The details I have of that night have been told to me by the people I was with, as I have no recollection of anything whatsoever. I know that I was fine until my vision became very blurry, I felt confused and nauseous. Within minutes I was on the floor, vomiting, convulsing and unconscious. During some of it, my mind was completely aware, but I had no control over my body movements at all. I had paramedics and strangers in the street helping me, I never saw their faces.

After many hours, and trip to the hospital, I was able to get safely home. My mum drove over an hour to find me sat alone and shivering at a hospital. It did not end there, for the next two days I was incredibly sick, dehydrated, and nauseous. The pub I was visiting took no responsibility. Therefore, this has gone completely unsolved, and I am left with a harrowing memory of that night. And now, the added fear of enjoying a night out with friends ever again. Having experienced this, I will forever take drug spiking seriously and try to bring awareness as to how terrifying it can be. I am also horrified at the new information of needles being used, especially with the risks of contracting unwanted diseases or infections.

How to know if you have been spiked

The problem with spiking, and how to stop it, is that it is completely out of a woman’s control. It should not be down to us to stay safe when we are not the culprits. We are just the victims of disgusting, predatorial people whose end goal is both terrifying and sad. With most culprits being male, it should be down to the those around us to help ensure our safety. Make your friends aware. And if you see a woman in trouble, try to intervene or ask if she is safe. As women we can still only do the bare minimum. Stay vigilant, cover your drinks, be mindful of who you are with. Even with all those measures in place it still doesn’t guarantee total safety.

Not everyone is aware of the signs of drink spiking. It can go completely unnoticed until it has already happened. However, if you do notice anything strange about your drink, such as an off smell or taste, let friends or staff know. These are some of the effects that drugs such as GHB (Rohypnol) can have and to be wary of. Remember, if you experience any of these, let someone around you know so you can get adequate help:

  • You have not had a lot to drink, but feel too drunk already
  • Blurred vision or black outs
  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Lack of awareness or confusion
  • Lack of control over body movements
  • Unconsciousness

What can venues do to keep us safe?

At the moment, there is a lot of talk about how local venues can make sure we are safe. How many more cases do there need to be for someone to take it seriously? A petition, started by Hannah Thompson from Glasgow, has been put forward to the government with over 140,000 signatures already. This petition is asking that nightclub venues should legally search everybody on their way in. In addition to this, women up and down the nation have planned “Girls Night In”. This is a day planned for the 27th of October where women boycott nightclubs and other local venues in order to stress just how seriously spiking need to be taken.

A few nightclubs and bars have already acted by some having “spiking strips” behind the bar. These are strips of CYD that analyse your drink and give an indication as to whether it has been tampered with. It picks up drugs such as GHB and Ketamine. However, only a few venues offer these. But they are extremely easy to get hold of, so it might be a good idea to take some with you yourself, just in case. But again, why is this our responsibility? We can only look out for ourselves until somebody steps in.

It is important that we keep raising awareness for the many women who have fallen victim to spiking, so if you want to make others aware, please share. Hopefully one day women will feel safe enough to enjoy a simple drink with their friends without fear.

Learn how to break free from worry and negative beliefs and reduce stress

Today lets take a look at how, being stuck at home might be causing you to feel anxious and depression. How getting rid of negative beliefs can reduce stress why it is important for your mental health and wellbeing. With so many people still worried about travel and/or working from home, life is still challenging.

Worrying is a form of thinking about the future, defined as thinking about future events in a way that leaves you feeling anxious or apprehensive. Many of us don’t know what the future holds right now and we are all worrying about many things.  When will lcokdown end? When can I see my family? Will I still have a job to go back to? How will I survive, let along thrive?

We’ve all been told that our stresses don’t really matter, that there’s no point in worrying. But have you ever been told that they don’t really even exist?

Well think about it for a minute. Worrying about the future that has not happened yet.  Yes it might but it also might not be as bad as you think.  How does worrying serve you in any way except to make you feel worse? Try these ideas to reduce worry, banish negative belief and feel better.

1. Have a daily worry period and let it go

Write down all your worried on paper.  Use one paper for each worry.  If an anxious thought or worry comes into your head during the day, make a brief note of it and then continue about your day. Remind yourself that you’ll have time to think about it later, so there’s no need to worry about it right now. Also, writing down your thoughts is much harder work than simply thinking them, so your worries are more likely to lose their power. Now find somewhere safe and go burn the worries.  Imagine as the ashes fly that the worries are diminishing and disappearing

2. Challenge negative beliefs

If you suffer from chronic anxiety and worry, chances are you are believe things are much blacker than they actually are. For example, you may overestimate the possibility that things will turn out badly, jump immediately to worst-case scenarios, or treat every anxious thought as if it were fact. You may also distrust your own ability to handle life’s problems, assuming you will fail. These types of thoughts, known as cognitive distortions, include:

  • All-or-nothing thinking, looking at things in black-or-white categories, with no middle ground. “If everything is not perfect, I’m a total failure.”
  • Generalisation from a single negative experience, that it will always be bad. “I failed that exam, I always fail exams.”
  • Focusing on the negatives and missing the positives. Noticing the one thing that went wrong, rather than all the things that went right. After an appriasal meeting you only remember the one improvement point not all the good stuff.
  • Coming up with reasons why positive events don’t count. “I did well on the test, but that was just dumb luck.”
  • Making negative interpretations without evidence. “I just know something terrible is going to happen.”
  • Expecting the worst-case scenario to happen. “The pilot said we’re in for some turbulence. The plane’s going to crash!”
  • Believing that the way you feel reflects reality. “I feel like such a fool. Everyone must be laughing at me.”
  • Assuming responsibility for things that are outside your control. “It’s my fault because i didn’t tell them to be careful.”

How to challenge these beliefs

During your anxious period, challenge your negative thoughts by asking yourself:

  • What’s the evidence that the thought is true? That it’s not true?
  • Is there a more positive, realistic way of looking at the situation?
  • What’s the probability it will come to pass?
  • Is the thought helpful? How will worrying about it help me and how will it hurt me?
  • What would I say to a friend who had this worry?
  • Has it happened before?
  • WhenI have worried before did it come to pass?

3. Is your worry solvable?

Productive, solvable worries are those you can take action on right away. For example, if you are anxious about finances, you could call your bank to see about flexible payment options. If the worry is solvable, start brainstorming. Keep a journal to help you notice patterns of behavious and negative beliefs.

If the worry is not solvable, accept the uncertainty. Worrying is often a way we try to predict what the future has in store-a way to prevent unpleasant surprises and control the outcome. The problem is, it doesn’t work. Thinking about all the things that could go wrong doesn’t make life any more predictable. Focusing on worst-case scenarios will only keep you from enjoying the good things you have in the present. Make a note of when these things happen and note the circumstances. How can you change the internal dialog? What positive action can you take?

4. Interrupt the worry cycle

Changing your state can help break the cycle of worry:

  • Get up and get moving
  • Get some fresh ai
  • Meditate
  • Dance
  • Practice deep breathing

Take a look at my Simple Stress Busters Video for more ideas.

5. Talk about your worries

Talking with someone who will listen to you without judging is one of the most effective ways to calm your nervous system and diffuse anxiety. When you are anxious and you start spiraling, talking about worries can make them seem far less threatening. They can also be great at challenging your beliefs and help you see a different path.

Keeping worries to yourself only causes them to build up until they seem overwhelming. But saying them out loud can often help you to make sense of what you’re feeling and put things in perspective. If your fears are unwarranted, verbalizing them can expose them for what they are—needless worries. And if your fears are justified, sharing them with someone else can produce solutions that you may not have thought of alone.

Build a strong support system. Human beings are social creatures. We’re not meant to live in isolation. If you are struggling in isolation take a look at blog from yesterday about social contact.

Keep away from too much social media. It is easy to overdose on the world problems and add to you worry and beliefs that everything is hopeless.  It will make you feel more anxious and helpless.  Limit to maybe once a day to catch the headlines and then go do something fun to feel better.

6. Practice mindfulness and feel less anxious

Take a look at the blog Be a bit more zen

For more help with anxiety also look at this article from the National Health Service